Ruthless Rhymes

There is too much good 'motorcyle action' on TV today to concentrate on blogging. And we are dining away for Father-in-Law's Day. But in view of yesterday's focus on literati, here are some ruthless rhymes wot I rote.

Wet Sophie

Sophie's such a silly creature
She fell into the water feature.
She did it, ne'er a doubt,
Trying to pick some pebbles out.
Slipping down each waterfall
She didn't do much harm at all,
But when she plopped into the sump
She went and blocked the wretched pump.
It caused her mother great distress -
She'd only lately bought that dress.

Dustbin Man

When Spotty raced down Coldblow Lane
Astride his Harley, in the rain.
I bet, just briefly, he was sorry
To meet the ascending dustbin lorry.
The impact made a dreadful sound
But, praise be, Spotty's still around;
They wear him as a mascot still,
Embedded in the engine grille


Fragrant Pru

Auntie Pru, with her great, hooked schnoz
Is like a witch - or at least, she was;
She caught it in the oven door
And doesn't have a nose no more.
It fell inside (she should have looked)
And came out awfully overcooked.
Alas, poor Auntie Pru's not well;
The good news is, she doesn't smell.

The Last Bus

Greedy Stephen (the daft berk),
While waiting for his bus to work,
Spotted something on the ground.
It was a 10p piece he'd found!
Believing it his lucky day
He bent across the carriageway
And thus poor Stephen met his fate;
The bus was prompt, and made him late.

DIY

Trying to fix a faulty socket
Father burnt up like a rocket.
He did not do us any favours -
The TV would not work for 'Neighbours'.